Traumatically haunted by it. Even till now when I think about it, my hair stands. Never once in my life was I this traumatized by a dream so vivid. Especially when I remember how grandma wailing in grief. Really breaks my heart.
Is it a sign?
I was told to pray. I will. But what’s coming will come.
My 3Ds - ”Don’t know, Don’t care and Don’t want to find out”.
I miss grandma. I hope she’s doing well in heaven. Even as I pray, you’re in my heart and mind.
I’m a little affected. I guess it would be ridiculous to say I’m not a least bit. But I’m used to psychoing myself to…”Don’t know, Don’t want to find out and Don’t care.”
Should I give up the greener pastuer for 1 tree?
I can be used to being alone now.
It’s just heart and mind will-power
and lesser love to give.
Can’t wait for the big break to come.
Everthing everthing ends.
The day I die is the best day of my life.
Tell my friends and my wife and my kids
That everthing’s gonna be alright.
The day I die is the best day of my life!
Fiestaaaaa.
I’m feeling emo.
Tired of work.
Tired of all the nags.
Tired of being disappointed.
Tired of uncertainties.
Tired of being anguished.
Tired of ignorance.
So tired and so tiresome.
I’m the needy one now.
Today is just not a good day.
I’m cold.
Don’t lose yourself.
It’s not worth it.
I feel down today.
But I don’t wanna talk about it.
That’s the problem.
I just don’t like to talk about it.
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Haha as i was reading my previous blogs again, it sort of made me happy. Especially the blog i wrote about J & M and ending off my sentence with “Do i have to wait for 7 fucking years?!? Fuck my life!” I’m amazed by myself, and the blog i wrote about I’m infalliable. Am I really now?
So funnyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. Yay. I managed to cheer myself up. Maybe I’m really infalliable.
I’m learning to accept criticisms with grace.
And I’m constantly fighting for time. It’s a race against the hare.
I want to win.
Weeeee! My first blog on my bb!
Anyways, today there was a debate btn K and R. Talking abt office stuffs. Interesting to hear, but also thankful my office not so drama.
I guess there is nothing called a secured ricebowl in the world out here. Sometimes it’s hard to sustain. Talking abt X, she’s a good influence on others, but can also be a bad influence. There is no right or wrong answer. Still, no matter what, management always have the upperhand. So X, I wish I can happily say fuck you management n I’m getting the fuck outta here.
There comes a point where you start doubting ur own abilities. But you know what? You can survive. Because it’s natural instinct. And like X always say, positive aura. And I know you’re capable! Just believe in yourself. I wanna step out of my job n do something that I’ve always wanted to do…to learn tailoring, do nitty stuffs. Money or skills. Tough choice. I know I cannot stay in this job anymore. I’m dreading it everyday.
Just waiting for my time to come. I want blackatelier to do well. Then I will say PISSSSS OFFFFFFF suckers!
Just waiting.
Hello!
We meet again! 
Thought I’d had a hard time finding you back, sure was tough. But all’s good now.
Welcome back.
Yippppppeeeeeeee!!!!!
